how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize