i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize