Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize