Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
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