i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize