Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Shame is for Republicans.
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