kristin has been a bad kristin
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
this just has baby written all over it
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
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Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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