I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize