if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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