if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
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