can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
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im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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