Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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