for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
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