I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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