It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize