I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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