i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize