Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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