She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize