I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize