dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
i think my cat just said my name.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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