id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
You're like the curious george of whores
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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