So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize