Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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