I didn't shave. On purpose
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize