the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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