Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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