New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize