best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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