I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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