yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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