Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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