just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
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I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
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I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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