Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize