I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
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Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
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I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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