i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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