You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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