Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
this beer tastes like vomit already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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