at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize