Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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