A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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