If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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