you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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