I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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