haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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