My Higher Power is John Stamos
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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