My nipple is on Facebook.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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