It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
try to milk me bitch
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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