all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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