just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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